I appreciate Angela Duckworth’s writing, so I was interested in her recent essay in the New York Times called “I Study Successful People. They Have One Habit in Common.”
What is that one habit? “Research has found that a willingness to ask for help is crucial to achievement.” Successful people, she argues, ask for help.
And yet that’s exactly the thing that I have a hard time doing. I tend to live independently, trying to figure things out on my own so I don’t have to bother others or rely on them. My wife has helped me overcome this tendency, but it’s still a struggle.
And this affects how I approach God as well.
What is one of the best things you can do in your life? Ask for help. Ask for help from others, but even more importantly, ask for help from God.
Come Needy
Scripture invites us to come to God for help:
Cast your burden on the LORD,
and he will sustain you;
he will never permit
the righteous to be moved.
(Psalm 55:22)
Jesus invites us to keep on asking, seeking, and knocking (Matthew 7:7-11). Other people may get tired of our requests for help, but God never does. Need wisdom? Ask God for what you need (James 1:5). Feeling anxious and feeling like you need something? Tell God about it (Philippians 4:6-7). Give your anxieties to God, knowing that he cares for you (1 Peter 5:7). Can’t even figure out what to pray? Bring your muddled prayers to God, trusting that God will intercede for you when you don’t know how to pray (Romans 8:26-27).
You can be sure that God is ready to hear your prayers, and that you will find help and mercy in time of need (Hebrews 4:16).
You have permission to come needy to your God.
In fact, one of the reasons why Jesus commands us to pray for daily bread is because he wants us to learn daily dependence on God for all that we need. Jesus could have told us to pray for our month’s worth of daily bread so we didn’t have to come bother him again every day. Instead, he encouraged us to live with an awareness of our daily need for God to provide everything we need in life, even the most basic of our necessities.
As Paul Miller writes, “The criteria for coming to Jesus is weariness. Come overwhelmed with life. Come with your wandering mind. Come messy.” As you do, ask God for exactly what you need.
Admitting the Truth
The question isn’t whether we need God’s help or not. We clearly do. Life is far too overwhelming, and our strength is far too small, to manage life on our own. Live long enough and you will see how many things are beyond your control, and how many situations are beyond your ability to manage.
The real issue is whether we will humble ourselves and admit that we need God’s help, and then live in daily dependence on him.
The quality that sets successful people apart, according to Angela Duckworth, is that they ask for help. It turns out that this isn’t just a quality that sets successful people apart; it’s also a quality that helps us in our walk with God as well.
Come to God. Tell him what you need. Don’t try to live on your own power. God is never exhausted by our neediness. He stands ready to listen, and he stands ready to help.
